[juddy1]

Not sure if this is the right forum. If not, admins please move it. Anyways, in the past I always struggled with my feelings right after orgasm whenever I'd masturbate in panties and/or other lingerie. Leading up to the moment, I was always soooooo turned on by thoughts of being dressed up, dressing up with and pleasuring (and being pleasured by) other crossdressers, etc. But immediately after orgasm, feelings of guilt, shame, and confusion would come over me. Kind of like, "what the hell is wrong with me for thinking these things?!?!" Then, about 15-20 minutes later the strong sexual urges would slowly start to come back.

Lately I've accepted that that's who I am, and that no matter what, those intense sexual feelings and urges will ALWAYS be there and will ALWAYS return after masturbating or sex. So instead of feeling guilty or confused, I now focus on how much I enjoyed the experience and how excited I am for my next one.

That said, I've never actually had an encounter with another crossdresser (only been dressed alone and around my girlfriend, who I am so glad accepts me for me), so who knows what I'd feel like then.

Anyone else go through the same thing? Have similar feelings? Have any advice?

[Pantyholic]

I really don't know some say it's guilt, some say its a religious thing, but I'm going to have a stab at it.
I reckon its a survival reaction inherited from when were were once monkey's or apes or whatever Darwin thoughts were concerning our evolution.
Testosterone inducement wants us to procreate and pass our genes on when the opportunity presents itself.
After climax or orgasm whatever you want to call it, the testosterone level drops dramatically, and our survival senses kick in.
Obviously when we were fornicating in the jungle that survival instinct was numbed, so any danger was oblivious to us.
That's why we feel guilty because we are in the survival mode after we cum. Then gradully the testosterone levels build up again and we are back into a pair of knicks and beating the meat.
It's a vicious circle, whether it be masturbating over a girlie mag, a porno film, or having sex with someone you don't think much of.
Just refrain from a purge when you are in the survival mode and you'll be ok.

[arnoldlane]

I get the very same effect. I agree with PH, in that it is a hardwired bio responce from the earliest part of the brain that says, "time to go, or get attacked/eaten". Animals are very defenseless while copulating. Plus, after the gasm, its time to find food/shelter/other quarry/head home, in short. Me thinks. However the impulse to change modes can be overcome.

[Pantied Suzi]

Yes, be careful of the urge to purge. Talk about regret.

[wetwillie]

I used to go thru a period of guilt and shame as well until I came out to my wife about my panty wearing. All of that suddenly disappeared.

[Teri]

I agree with PH and felt that way for years until I accepted myself and my feminine side. Since then it's been great, being in touch with both my male and female side. Now those feeling still do come around occasionally but they don't last long at all.

I also think if you have a partner and your keeping your feminine part of your life a secret you may have these thoughts out of guilt.

[willinwa]

I agree with the above as well -- I suspect that the guilt feelings also have to do with the social programing that many of us grew up with.
So many things in our culture taught us that pleasure is wrong -- religious training told us masturbation was sinful -- wasting time and energy -- throwing panties into the mix adds another layer of guilt/shame/doubt about masculinity -- all that sort of crap contributes to feeling as if your mom walked in and caught you jerking off in her underwear.

But pleasure and desire aren't bad things -- they exist -- sometimes you indulge in them and then you move on. They're just parts of the multi-faceted creatures that we are. Denying and suppressing those aspects of our personalities only makes people neurotic -- and that's the sort of thing that leads to sex criminals, psychotics, serial killers.

I say relax and enjoy your kinky side -- without getting totally obsessed by it.

[fredspage]

The "down" feeling is caused by a hormone which is released at the end of the orgasm. It counteracts the efect of the testosterone. The conscious mind has to explain this feeling so it uses the guilt thing. Check out "explanations" on my website.

As I got older, I began to avoid having orgasms so that I could have more fun. I am now at the stage of having an orgasm very seldom, only when I really want to. I never encounter the down feeling and can continue sex for as long as I like. My partner (male) says I am oversexed as I am always up for it. I don't get hard enough to penetrate anybody but I enjoy all the other kinds of activity.

So don't believe the stories about "at your age its all in the mind." I am 82 and have sex with my partner most days at least once! He is an expert at dealing with a soft cock. The nerves are still there even if the blood is lacking. I still use sildenafil (generic viagra) up to 100mg per day.

Enjoy life, panties, and sex without guilt!

Fred (www.fredspage2.org )

PH; delete the link if it is illegal.

This post has been edited by Pantyholic: 17 October 2010 - 11:22 PM
Reason for edit: made the link clickable ;)

[ilovepurplepanties]

Over the years my feelings of guilt have come and gone. Some days I feel disgusted and guilty after orgasm, and other days I feel fine. I think that everyone else has already explained why this might happen. I have noticed that if I do not rush to take off my panties and bra after climax, then my feelings of guilt are much less than if I rip them off right after I finish. Maybe try to keep on your panties after you cum and see if that helps with your guilt.

[TerriC]

I would always get that "guilty/ ashamed" feeling when I first started wearing. It was only after I realized this was part of who I am, did I become comfortable with it... even though it did take quite a few years to come to that realization.

[fourinches]

Just don't cum.

[KnickerBocker]

That's easier said than done 4"`s, especially when panties are involved.

I admit I used to feel guilty and sometimes still can feel that way. I expect it is just normal acquiescing to societal norms. I don't recall those feelings coming on any stronger after coming, but I've always been comfortable with the idea of making myself come, and screw society if they don't realize you have to love yourself first before you can love others.

[Undresser35]

I've had the same guilt feelings, but not after masterbation, but after sex with other fellas

[Stephen]

Right after I blew a load in my wife last night, the panties came off. She went to the bathroom to let my cum drip out of her vagina, and I didn't want to have them on when she came back. I'm not quite sure what it is. I don't think I feel 100% comfortable wearing them around her, so I'm still a little embarrassed. Besides that, the thought of waking up in them at 7AM (before work) doesn't seem very erotic. I prefer to wear them on the weekends. I will also wear them all night when I am alone traveling.

[wearingthem]

Wow What a great topic.I feel exactly the same way a lot of the time after cuming when in panties etc.The more girl gear I have on the worse I can feel sometimes. Occassionally I am lucky enough to have sex or just masterbate with my g/f whilst in panties.I do not always feel that comfortable when dressed with her and sometimes she prefers i remove the panties.I just luv having sex with her whilst in panties and looking down and seeing what i have on.I keep telling myself i am in panties in front of her as i go in and out of her.But when i cum i feel huge embarrasment and want to crawl in a hole.I do usually remove them swiftly after cuming.I do now try to leave them on for longer and have slept in them once or twice.The feeling has improved.She assures me afterwards not to feel bad or embarassed.
Similarly when i have had the odd encounter with a guy afterwards i also feel dirtyish.I do luv to go to a public toilet and flash my panties at a guy there for a certain purpose.I get rock hard as i masterbate in the panties or have him suck me off tho!
I am now on the odd, available opportunity,dressing a lil in girly clothes and I do luv the feeling.After I cum I will whip it all off promptly tho.
So it has been a help to read others comments and do hope my experience is similar to more out there.Guess I am getting in touch with that feminine side and liking it.Also i do believe that testosterone release etc has something to do with it.
PS: Im in hipster jeans,g string pulled right up bra packed full to overflowing and tight tank top.My tits r so big I can barely c the keyboard.But fuk it feels soooo good and so right!!!

[mic091221]

I used to feel that way,, but over the years, i just got used to being in a nightgown at night time when ever i can.. so if i cum, i will just snuggle up and after a few minutes,, i feel sexy again.. and will be ready for another one in the morning.. but i have to say it took years where i felt everything was coming off as soon as i came.. only to put something else back on a little later when i relaxed....

it is probably the same thing with tasting cum... while your all excited, you are wanting to taste everything,, but the moment that you climax, something in your body puts up the Stop sign and says,,, you don't want to taste that... LOL... and you clean yourself off right away not wanting to touch anything,, but while you were excited,, you were so ready to try... I cannot put my finger on it,, but i wish i could push myself past that point.

[urge2wear]

Like others that have posted I used to have the same feelings of shame and guilt but I eventually overcame them.

[DirkGently]

I love the feeling of being dressed and I find it very sexually exciting. I really love others to see me so I have been web-camming on and off for the past few years. I guess it's because I know they accept me and enjoy me as much as I enjoy it. I do feel guilty though after web-camming especially if I cum while camming. I usually try not to talk to people but I just want to know someone is there watching me. I guess that's another story. I guess I'm an exhibitionist among other things, but I do that with web-camming and posting pics rather than in public where I could get into serious trouble.

Anyway, I don't have as much guilt anymore... as time goes by. And I do stop (and sometimes purge things) from time to time. Usually once the summer is over, the urges come back, I give myself a full body shave and start getting dressed again. Maybe it's related to the sun or the moon.

I just know, I'm probably never going to stop and always going to like it.

Just wished my wife was on board so I didn't have to sneak around.